Modern Cloth - Who'd have thunk it???

So, we are on the Modern Cloth Nappy path and after a couple of weeks at it, I have to admit I'm really loving it. So much so that I spend alot of time scouring the internet for more, more, more....

How many more do I need? Well, I'm a lazy washer you see. So I probably need about a half dozen more to complete my stash but.... where do you stop. I mean there are so many to choose from. There are wool soakers (oh so cute but you really only one maybe 2), fleece covers (again a cover so you don't need as many as nappies), and don't get me started on the nappies. You can get any colour you like in just about any style.

Then you have to get into the fitted cloth, All-In-Ones, Pockets, flats, pre-folds. Is your head spinning yet?

And then! Then! The disappointment of receiving a nappy and it not performing to your expectations. Oh my! What a disaster! But you really want them to succeed so you try and try and you make them tighter and looser and add more to them but, I guess, at some stage you have to call a lemon, a lemon right? I'm just not ready to give up yet cos I really want them to work.

But I gotta tell ya, look at this bum and tell me it's not cute.

You can see why it's so easy to get hooked can't you?

Changes, Changes, Everywhere.....

But if you just sit and stare, you stay the same. Sit and stare.......

And oldie but a goodie from Playschool. Wow! I spend alot of time with my 3 year old!

Anyway, not sure if I love the new look but as the old saying goes "A change is as good as a holiday".

Now, if I just close my eyes and drift....

"Maaaaamma, I need cuggles!"

Eh, let's just see if we like it over time shall we?

PS. It was meant to be....the default font is Georgia - my favourite!

They Sayers Part 2....

Following on from this small comment I thought I would write down where it came from.

During Operation "Clean The Office" I have come across these notes scribbled down on a piece of paper and I felt it worthy of reproduction. My mum doesn't understand why I would write this down. But, as she says, she's old!

Anyway, here goes...

Apparently the nature of my 2nd daughter has nothing to do with her personality. It's all about me as a mother.

This presents a couple of issewes for me. The first being that I was such a shit mother the first time around - and I did everything the "right" way like "they" said - that my first daughter cried for the most part of her first 11 months with us, until I bought a shop and left her with other people to try and put a stop to the vicious circle we had managed to create.

And the second being that my new gorgeous girl, who has hardly shed a tear in 3 months, cried so hard today - and I'm not talking a little whinge that I could cope with, I mean really cried, holding her breath and working up to a scream kinda cry - for 30 minutes, all while in the car, that I was a blubbering mess by the time I arrived at my Mums. Not to mention the speeding fine I got on the way which, not only hurt my hip pocket, but prolonged the experience for another 10 minutes while the unsympathetic bastard wrote me the ticket. Now, this new episode, surely reiterates the fact that I'm a shit mum. Or does it?

Because she has never cried like this before, does it mean I've been more relaxed until now and then, what, out of the blue I've decided that this baby is stressing me out?

To all you "they sayers" - IT'S NOT ME!

I proved this today by being instantly transported back 3 years ago to my first screaming child. I don't cope with cyring babies. Who does? I may even make the situation worse or better depending on sleep and hormones or lack thereof but I am no more relaxed this time around than with my first (except for the fact that she's an easier baby).

In fact, I'm probably worse because of all the crying I endured the first time around. I pick this baby up when I hear so much as a whimper so she won't cry. I have had health nurses tell me that it's unrealistic to think I can stop her from crying all the time but I'm sure as hell trying. This time I've done everything "they" say not to do so maybe "they" are wrong.

And this time I have a toddler to deal with as well! More relaxed???? Who are you kidding? Ever tried getting 2 kids to sleep in unison. Sleep deprived isn't just 2 words, it's a parallel universe!

Mum relaxed? I doubt it (I've still got the same hormonal issues I've always had, even moreso now I'm back on the pill).
Calmer baby? Definitely.
Shit mother? No way!

And, for the record, I am hard enough on myself without being told "they say I'm doing everything wrong". As most mums will agree, our guilt runs deeper than you could ever dig.

So you can tell me "they say" all you like but "they" are not at my house or in my car when all hell breaks loose and I am just a mother getting through the first year as best I can on broken sleep, raging hormones and loads of bad advice!

There! Phew!

Just to clarify....

After I wrote this I received some great support but I felt I needed to put the record straight on my poor DH.

He is a great guy. He knows he's got it good. He says so often.

But as with every human being when a chance to have a whinge presents itself he's gonna take it.

He didn't have a car over christmas so I guess by the time our friends came to visit he was feeling a bit caged. I totally understand. I don't have to drive my car for days on end but take it away from me and I'll go stir-crazy just knowing I can't go anywhere.

So, really, he is good to me and our children and the two weeks at home has made a world of difference in his relationship with Schmoo. He agrees that his bond with Schmoo is much better now that they've had to spend some time together and to see him with her now makes my heart smile.

They're mates now so it was all worth it!

And most importantly, he can still make me laugh like no one else so he must be doing something right.

Phew! Okay, done!

I love ya hunny!!!

One of those days.....

You know those days, when you just can't quite pinpoint exactly what's eating at you?

You know, the type of days when the smallest things annoy the absolute crap out of you?

When you feel like you could cry one minute, laugh the next and totally lose your cool if someone even so much as looks at you the wrong way?

When you feel like you're just holding on by a thread, trying so hard to keep it together but in an instant your whole world could come crashing down around you?

When you can't decide whether these things are truly invoking such emotions or whether it's hormones or lack of sleep or you're just plain over it?

That's been my world since about oh.....Christmas.

It's a girl thing....

So I get a phonecall the other day while I'm at the shop and my husband says "Well, she's definitely your daughter!"

Apparently the conversation went something like this.....

Daddy: What would you like to eat?
AJ: Some chocolate please.
Daddy: No.
AJ: Awww why not daddy?
Daddy: You can't just eat chocolate all the time.
AJ: But Daddy you just don't understand. You don't like chocolate but mummy and I do because we're girls!

The girl's gotta point Daddy!

Fashion Victim...

"Mummy, I was just seeing if these were fitting my eyes."

*pause*

"So do they?"